Ramones Baby – Now I Wanna Be a Good Boy

Everyone knows that the Ramones are the best band ever. Well maybe not everyone does, but if you know me and if you know one thing about me, then you probably know that I think that that they are, for sure, by a long shot, the best band ever! So when I found out I was going to become a father, after my initial excitement (and fear), when I settled down and got used to the idea and started to think about what kind of a start in life I wanted to give the little guy, it was only natural that I wanted to introduce and combine everything that I was passionate about so far in my life with the newest and greatest passion I would ever have. The things that inspire me, the things that excite me, the things that shape and define me, I wanted to share it all with him. The authors and stories that fed my imagination and kept the adventures going even hours after I’d put the books down and fallen asleep, my music and the various music genres that came and went through the years (each one leaving its own imprint) versus the ever present theme tunes of my life. Or my sports teams I could lose my mind and my voice over, with the power to make my weekend or destroy my week, all in the space of 90 minutes. Graphic novels, comics, movies, artwork, museums, and cities I’d traveled to and countries I’d lived in. I wanted to share with him everything I’d come across in my life that molded me in some way, all the wonderful things that made the cut.

So of course way up there on that list was the Ramones! Way, way, way up there!

But how do you go about doing that? Does something “Ramonesey” for a kid, or better yet for a baby, even exist? And if it does where can you find it? This is exactly what I asked myself, and this is how I’ve managed to do it:

1. Ramones Teddies

So when I first started searching I figured the most likely thing that would exist would be a Ramones teddy bear. I don’t know why, but I could picture some uber-fan out there that took it upon herself to dress-up a teddy bear in jeans and a biker jacket, with a crazy big black wig and maybe even some rose sunglasses, and sell it to the masses. Well maybe something like that exists out there (and if it doesn’t, it’s a damn good idea which you can have for free, gimme a heads up and I’ll be your first customer!), but I didn’t search long enough to find out. I came across the Ramones Toxic Teddies and my search ended there! These little guys are great, they’re about 3.5” in height and very well detailed, and whilst they really do look like they’re porcelain they’re only plastic, so they look like the real deal whilst they sit there on display but are battle ready to be beat and thrown about when the kid wants to play. This is the first thing I bought for my kid, when he wasn’t but three months in his moms belly, and when I told my cousin I’d bought him something she asked if it was an Iggy music box! Which it could have almost been (again, you can have this idea for free, and I’ll be your first sale!), I love that she knows me so well! And I’m pretty intrigued to see what he does with them when he’s a little older; I used to have Cowboys and Indians figures, Knights and Castles, and Star Wars figures and Transformers. I wonder if the brat will play Ramones with Johnny, Joey, Deedee and Marky?!

2. Ramones Lullabies

This was a present from his uncle Garcia, who had it for a while because we didn’t run into each other, and I could tell he was super excited to give it to me. But I didn’t think it was going to be any big deal. I mean you find out your friend’s having a baby and you buy them a little something, a little token of acknowledgment that you’re excited for them, but really what could be so great about a baby gift? Right? Wrong!!! There is the Ramones Lullabies CD! This is one of the most amazing gifts I have ever been given. I was blown away. I am so glad my baby has this in his life, and I get to put him to sleep listening to some Ramones classic! I will say that it was sort of painful listening to the songs at first, I mean here’s a band known for playing their music four times faster than everyone else, and these songs are like 20 times slower (on the glockenspiel and with no vocals). But it’s all good fun and certainly makes feeding the little guy a bottle in a rocking chair in the corner of a dark room a little more entertaining. And I love that the Ramones are finally getting the respect and notoriety they deserve; the label now has a whole ton of bands lullabyified, but the Ramones was one of the first CD’s they put out.

2. Ramones Onesie

There’s not much to say on this, I mean it’s a frickin Ramones onesie! If you’re a rock-baby and you’re gonna own one onesie then let it be this! The crest of the Ramones – Johnny, Joey, Deedee, Tommy we salute you! And we’ll probably throw up on you too! It’s a little too big for the tyke right now, it’s for 6-12 months and he’s just 3 (awww), but man am I looking forward to getting him in that thing! I bought it from a wicked store near me called Funky 7 that sells the greatest selection of t-shirts, and maybe I could have found a smaller size online somewhere, but I’m happy to support my local community. Oh and I bought Garcia Jr. a Fuel onesie there also (Metallica is to Garcia as Ramones is to me!). Who knows maybe in a few months when Jackson is old enough to wear his onesie he’ll also be ready to upgrade from the lullabies to the originals?! Well at least the slow ballads!

Of course whilst I’m being serious about all this, I’m also being tongue-in-cheek, just like a Ramones song!